Two Chapters: Leaving and Going

This is it. The day where I say goodbye to my family and friends, though really it’s been like that all week.  But here’s the thing. Everybody knows the saying “this isn’t goodbye just see ya later”. Everybody also knows that no matter what whenever you part ways there is an overflow of emotions. You could be relieved from the happy chaos or heartbroken from the overwhelming realization of the emptiness you will feel once they are gone. Whatever the emotion is the “see you later” doesn’t make it any easier. We only say that to give us hope of the next time you’ll see them.  Because no matter how hard we try the “see you later” is never a sure thing. And is sometimes farther away than we want, but it’s that hope that we cling to. 

You hope that you’ll stay in touch. You hope that they’ll stay safe. You hope that you’ll see them again.

To all my friends and family, I hate that you have to cling to that hope, I really do. And the only thing I can do is promise with all my might to do everything in my power to try and stay in touch, try to stay safe, and to try to come home. I wasn’t raised to make empty promises. But these, these I can uphold. These are NOT empty.

With that brings up my next thought. God has made a promise to me. Well actually he made a promise to all of us.  But in this case, I’ll just be talking about me. Selfish I know.  A verse that was recently showed to me is this, Psalms 37:4 and 5 “4.Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. 5.Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this”. These verses aren’t saying that if you love God then he will give you a new car. It’s saying that the more you love God, the more you get to know God, and the more you want what he desires then God gives you the desires of your heart. This came into play in my lift just this week.  I was crunching numbers again trying to see where I was in my funding journey.  It’s a good thing I’m good at math and like doing it because I think I redid the numbers like 3 times just to make sure that my final number is right. Now I can’t Exactly remember how much my big number was, but that isn’t the important part of this section. The important number was/is $160.00. Now the reason why I put “was/is” is because that number is all I needed to be fully funded and that number was given to me just days ago.

Pretty crazy right?! Just 3 days before I leave God provided me that last $160.00. Like the verse said God will give me my heart’s unselfish desires if I trust Him. I knew that God would give me funding. I knew that God wanted me on this trip so I also knew that he would provide all my funding. Maybe that’s why I never did any fundraising. I don’t know.  I am so very great full that I don’t have to worry about funding while I’m gone. Not that I actually did a whole lot of worrying. I’ve pretty much just handed my funds to God and said “you do you, bro.” “Provide if and when you want”. Thankfully though God was like “you cool. Ima provide for you now” to which I’m like “YAY!”

Did y’all appreciate my play-by-play of how my convos go with God? I like to think he is a pretty chill guy and uses words like “bro” and “chill” hahaha.

Anyway, so God has been so abundant in every aspect of my life. I have never felt so much love and joy as I have this year. But at the same time, I have never been so stressed and sad. Though life doesn’t happen without both. So I guess I should just be great full to be alive. Seems legit right?

So I’m fully funded, on my way to Georgia, and let’s see….oh I know!

My whole life fits into about 5 totes. How do I know that some might ask? Or not. But if you did great, I’m about to tell you. If not, too bad I’m still gonna tell you. The reason that I know that my entire life fits into about 5 totes is because I fit my entire life into about 5 totes. Haha. No really, I packed up my entire room. And shoved it (sometimes nicely) into about 5 totes. Why? To give my sister my room while I’m gone. I’m gone for 9 months what use is my room to me. When I could just have Kayla (MJ) use it while I’m gone. It beets her having to share a room with her sister. We love Onnie but it is nice to have your own space. And since my room is empty, I thought it a good idea to just have MJ take it. I’ll figure out where I’ll stay when I’m home later. No biggie…hopefully.

Oh My GOLLY!!!! I almost forgot! How could I almost forget one of the most important days of my life??? Oh, yea…maybe I should tell you what that is. Okay so warning I am not boasting or fishing for anything. I am simply giving you an inside to my life because I thought y’all would want to know. Okay? Good. Glad we are on the same page.

So here it is *drum roll!* I officially have my Black belt!!!!! Like not the skunk belt one. But a better one that gives me special powers like “k——–” JK you don’t get to know. Wanna know the best part? I’m the first person in the art. Period. Like nobody else has rank, let alone a black belt. Because it’s the art my dad just made for women’s self-defense. Pretty cool right?? But yea…so I’m really excited about that because it gives me credentials that allow me to officially be able to teach other people. So that’s pretty awesome!! Oh, did I mention that it was a surprise to me? Yup dad was like “get your but over here” got a little scared at that because he even gave me the eyebrows. For those who know the eyebrows, knows. So, I thought I was in trouble. Turned out he just wanted to promote me. Oh! And it was one of his black belts. And that was super emotional. But so worth it!

Not sure if I have anything el—-

I almost forgot the official date I leave the country is November 5^th. I head to Romania first.

And here are some important information about the next 8 weeks:

1. I CANNOT! Receive mail. Guys this is huge. There will be no way to receive any mail.
2. I WILL have Wi-Fi and a data plan. So, if you want to contact me you can in pretty much any way. But disclaimer I only have my phone in the mornings and evenings. So, if you contact me and I don’t respond don’t worry I’ll get back to you as soon as possible.
3. Saturdays are my days off. All-day Saturday I can have my phone so that is the most ideal day to have a conversation that is more than five minutes.
4. If I die, you’ll know.

This time I am sure that I don’t have anything else to say. Other than the basic….

Have a GREAT day!!! Be HAPPY!! and please please please remember to PRAY!!!! Love you guys! And I’ll see you guys next Saturday!! <3